I should have gone home earlier

Sometimes I have to remind myself of how I walked away with my clenched fist stuck deep in my pocket. When that happend I thought of giving up.

But I didn't. I thought it was all a test of my patience. Maybe it just made me uninteresting and pale. I don't really care. I think it's better than the fighting and the arguing.

Once I was a soldier

I met him just before the war. On my way to the border.
We had so much in common. The same boring upstart in middle class hell.

We were in the same unit, in the same uniform, in the same army.
In the chaos he disapeared and everything we had fought for seemed in vain. I lost a good friend and we lost the war. We all went home. Before the war we thought we would be heroes and save the world.

Four weeks ago I met him on the train to work. I barely recognized him. He was in a poor state. He told me he liked himself better when he was drunk. In a sober state he could feel fear and anxiety. He said he had been thinking a lot about going to therapy so I told him that I would listen.

Last night he told me that he thinks our sessions are good for him. And I told him I think it does me a lot of good too. He said he felt much better now but I know he was lying. There was still a lot of happiness leaking on the inside.

The wonders of the world

Its ice on a beach. It looks weird but I took it from above, straight down on the dark ice with sand inbetween.
That ice has some stories to tell. And maybe it's right, maybe we are in a terrarium. I can't imagine what I would do without food. We never think about how we would manage without water. I thought we had conquered the earth but it turns out I was wrong.

I know I said I would give up slowly but change fast. I feel I just have to change. The sunshine on my face fades when I get bad news. So I need to change.

Confessions of a weird mind

They have rearranged this monster put on a suit and tie.
They have made it to a concept so that sales would hit the sky.

I wonder if he ever thought about trying to phone her. I guess not.
He belived that love was a threat to society. That if he couldn't provide he would be left alone. For the moment he was unemployed.

When I spoke with him yesterday he said something that disturbed me.
"I try to be good, I try to help people in need. But then I close my eyes just like we close our borders to the third world. Who are we to give or take lives? The world is revolting and we are a part of the shit"

Party Monster

Maybe its a disco bloodbath your looking for.
Here's a hammer and follow that club kid.
It's the third door on the right.
You don't get famous if you don't try some.
And remember to give him the last trip.

Angel was resting in pieces in the tub.

Sometimes Michael would addmit the murder.
When he was on Special K with James St James.

I am a blind man

If your leaving close the door.
I am not expecting people anymore.

Here me greiving lying on the floor.
Whether I am dead or drunk I really aint too sure.

I am a blind man and my world is pale.

Had a friend once in a room.
Had a good time but it ended much too soon.

On a rainy night in that room.
Found a reason for the things we had to do.

I am a blind man and now my room is cold.

Drop me anywhere

Maybe you ask yourself is he dead or is he dizzy.
For I dont know. I think he is fine.
I think he is getting along.
Adjusting, making out and doing what everybody else is.

I think he is still in the grass. Like when he was 14.
He'd hear the trains. He'd hear the trucks.
He didn't know they would hurt him so bad.

And to all you fenceleaners: are you worth what you get paid? Or is it just fools gold? Yes its only fools gold so why should I bargain?

Curtain, applause, now don't expect any encores.

Thank you.

On the other side

He had no idea about the consequences.
About the anger he had stored inside.
He was scared of himself. Of what he had become.

Once he was a moneymaker.
A well known taker and a fortune faker.
He thought he could turn his back and everything would go away.
But he was always concious of his guilt.
And it kept him with fear.

One day it just blew his mind out with a bang.
No more enchiladas.

Before the trenches

I think I have done my time.
Engaged, Enraged, Erased.

Now I am hungry for love.
Is this the last ditch? Is it the last?
Tell me that this is the last ditch!

Rain pouring down on a man walking by himself in Bagarmossen. In the green plastic bag he carried his companion for the day. His bottle.

The beauty of true love.

So people tell me I shouldn't worry.
There is a beauty out there who soon will embrace me.

I'm taking the long road but I will get there on time.
Shortcuts are the worse cuts.